Looking back ...

Pleasure is the flower that passes; remembrance, the lasting perfume. -Jean de Boufflers

Since I was little I have loved to capture every moment. I saved everything that one day might have some significant place in my life. I still have old cards from middle school friends, black and white photo booth pictures, and even a note or two that was folded up and passed across a classroom of kids in high school. Over the years I have taken out the boxes and albums, sometimes purging an item or two, and marveled at how much life has changed. These walks down memory lane have always reminded me of how blessed that I am.

This time of year, as I prepare for Zoey's Birthday, I can't help but take a walk down memory lane. Right at this moment, four years ago, I was on hospital bedrest praying that Zoey would stay inside just a few more weeks. That her lungs would be strong and that she would be alright.

From the moment she was born it was important for me to capture every.single.moment. I wanted to make sure that one day I would have lots of pictures for us to look at and marvel at the person that she has become. I then began making yearly books so that I could record a wonderful story - the story of My Sweet Zoey Marie.

And so the story began.......

on August 20th, after 5 days of labor, Zoey Marie entered the world 2 and 1/2 months early.

We named her Zoey... because Zoey meant life... and after all the weeks on bedrest, all the complications, surgeries, and prayers she just had to live.

I thought that she was the most beautiful baby I ever saw. Now looking back - she kinda looks like a tomato. A beautiful RED tomato.

Almost ready to come home.....

(4 months old ) This picture is extra special because we just sent James the same outfit, hat, blanket, and lovey Ku-Ku bird set from Kushies. Who would have thought they would still have it for sale 4 years later ?!?! I am hoping and praying that James' foster mama takes a picture of him in it.

9 months old - we just completed the March of Dimes March for Babies walk. I am a believer that when something touches your life profoundly in some way that you should use it to make a difference. I was chosen to be the mission mom for my county and was able to share Zoey's story at a rewards banquet after the walk.

How do you know it is time to party ???

Zoey is in her birthday suit !!!!

That was the slogan and picture for Zoey's 1st Birthday invites- I couldn't resist!

Sleeping in Mexico.

I love to travel, Anthony loves to travel, and we were thrilled that Zoey loves to travel. This picture was from her first trip to Mexico. Just last week she was asking to pack her suitcase after my sister arrived for a visit and she saw hers. Anytime we have to pick someone up from the airport she thinks she is going on a special trip.

So hard to belive how much she has grown.

And how quick the time passes - 2nd Birthday

This little girl is full of life. She has so much personality.

3 years old - oh how my little girl grew this year. She has learned so much and has become so independant.

- She loves to dress herself. She changes several times a day ( creating lots and lots of laundry) and some of the outfits she picks out are , well, just plain interesting. She loves dress up and make up and she knows how to apply her eyeshadow just like JEM from my childhood days.

- She LOVES to learn. Even after being at preschool all day she loves to come home and play "homework". One of my favorite things to play as a kid was "school" so I am always up for it - especially since she always lets me be the teacher!!! Oh - how I hope this lasts forever!!!! She has mastered her colors, shapes, numbers, uppercase and lowercase letters and is even working on her letter sounds. She can spell and write her name, write quite a few other numbers and letters, and is super creative.

- She says her prayers every night... and most nights I have to hold back the laughter and keep a straight face. They always start with "Dear God" and always end with "Amen- The end." Sometimes in an effort to stall bedtime she can be very long winded and pray for everyone she knows, but when she is tired she only prays for a few. I love that she never forgets ger baby brother - "James Jun-Hop" aka Jun-ha

- She loves board games and I love playing them with her. I love how happy she gets when she wins, but even more I love how happy she gets when I win. (Maybe she feels bad for me because she usually wins.) I love the way she tells me "you did it mama" and "great job". It reminds me in this role of being her MaMa I must be doing something right.

- She has some awesome make believe skills too. Last week I peeked into the playroom and she was having a great big birthday party with her dolls. Complete with a party hat that she had gotten at her friends party. She served cake and ice cream playfood and had everything set up perfectly. Her favorites are ballerina, showtime, tea party, and picnic. Have I told you how much I love childhood wonder ?

- She can work a computer and knows about a mouse and homepage. My ipad is filled with her favorite apps and she can turn it on and work it 100% on her own.

- She takes the school bus now. After I went to preschool with her and stayed the entire day for months and after she cried every.single.day when I dropped her off she now happily gets on the bus and goes to school. So, while I was scared to even try because I thought she was not ready, she was too small, etc she suprised me and it was exactly what she needed.

And I am still not sure where this last year went..... or how it passed so quick..... it was nothing short of absolutely amazing.

The hard times and difficult struggles that we had hardly seem memorable.... and while new struggles have come up we are better equiped. We have stronger faith now and know that great things are happening.

We dance in the rain.

We embrace this great.big.beautiful.life.

And as we prepare to celebrate our baby girl we continue to pray for our baby boy. We can't wait for him to be home. She is such a wonderful big sister already.



She even gave us our very first family portrait.

I am one blessed MaMa.