Half way around the world is a person that I have never met and I know
very little about...yet, I feel this huge connection that stretches across the ocean
all the way back to South Korea.
Sometimes when James smiles his larger then life smile I wonder what she looks like.
I wonder if she is on the other side of the pond wondering if he is happy, what he is doing,
how he is growing.
Other times I am driving..and I look into my rear view mirror and see this sweet innocent
boy who has already been through so much in his short little life and the tears fall down my
cheeks as I wonder if she will ever know how much this little boy means to us.
(yeah, thats corn on the cob)
I think about the amazing person that she is and how without her selfless act
I would not be blessed to parent James, to be his mother - his Omma.
Last week, I prepared a letter and photos for James' file, so that if /when she
is ready she can acess the file and know that he is happy and healthy and so very loved.
I was suprised at how hard it was to put into words what I wanted to say. It was hard
not to think about the fact that if Korean society was more excepting of children born
out of wedlock that she might have made another choice.... That she loved this little boy so much
that she chose to give him the gift of life knowing that she would not be able to see him live it.
I told her that we love this boy more then life.
How he is so smart and keeps us on our toes.
How he loves animals, being on the go, trains, cars, and anything that big sister is doing.
How we are celebrating his birthday - Big!!! With pony rides and a petting zoo because this
mama remembers how hard it was not to celebrate his first birthday with him so this year
we are making up for it. Oh, and how James will be going on vacation in a few months to Disney too.
And how I think of her often and pray that she has peace in her heart....
that I will try my hardest to give him the great big beautiful life she hoped for him when she made an adoption plan.... that I promise to send updates each year so that she can see James grow...and that I will
always support any relationship the two of them might have in the future.
As James' birthday gets closer I am sure that this is a tough time for her.
Please pray that she has peace and can feel in her heart that James is happy, healthy, and finally home.
Legacy of an Adopted Child
Once there were two women who never knew each other.
One you do not remember, the other you call mother.
Two different lives, shaped to make your one...
One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.
The first gave you life and the second taught you to live it.
The first gave you a need for love, and the second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name.
One gave you a seed of talent, the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions, the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile, the other dried your tears.
One gave you up ... that's all she could do.
The other prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.
And now you ask me, through your fears,
the age old question unanswered throughout the years...
Heredity or environment, which are you the product of?
Neither, my darling … neither.
Just two different kinds of love.
~ Author Unknown ~
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