Five years ago, at this very moment, I was in the hospital
praying with everything that I had that Zoey would be healthy.
We knew that she would be born premature....
the doctors were amazed that I had made it to 30 weeks.
After months of bedrest in the hospital, appointments and specialists,
and a roller coaster ride of emotions there was nothing more
that modern medicine could do - August 20th was the day-Zoey's Birthday.
I wish that I could say that it was a magical event filled with soft music and a perfect birthplan...
but it wasn't. The small room was quickly crowded with doctors and specialists as the monitor showed
that her heartrate was quickly dropping. It was a whirlwind... so much was going on around me but I stayed silent ...silent and prayed that this baby girl who was so wanted, longed for, and loved would breath.
And then she entered the world...and the room was silent... at first she didn't cry.
I kept crying "is she alright, is she alright" and that brief moment in time seemed a million years long.
And then she cried..... a soft cry that let me know she was alive, and breathing.
She was a MIRACLE.
It may have been her Birth Day but I definitely got the greatest gift that day.... to be her MaMa.
The journey in the Nicu was hard,
but i knew that I was meant to be a mother...
her mother....and that from the moment she came into the world
that my life would never be the same.
It would be more....
...more meaningful....
...purposeful....
...filled with more joy then we ever thought we would know.
To watch her grow, and learn, and develop has brought so much more to our lives.
The time goes so quickly and I try to freeze the moments in my mind.
The days turn to months and the months into years...
and you really can't help to wonder where the time went.
Somehow, in the blink of an eye...
the tiny little girl that I watched struggling to breathe in the
NICU is so much older, more mature, and not so little.
She is "5".
Sweet baby girl,
You light up our lives more then we ever imagined.
It is amazing to watch you grow...to take your special needs and flourish...to turn them into gifts.
This past year you have accomplised so much, learned so much, matured so much.
You embraced your role as big sister and it is fun to watch this new relationship develop.
Keeping working hard and reaching big - nothing is impossible.
We love you sweet princess.... to the moon and back...infinity and more...forever and ever.
xoxox